Dream Worthy dreams
They say Alexander the Great wept when he achieved his dreams of world domination.
Some goals are like a child blowing bubbles. He blows and blows, and all the bubbles multiply and spread and dissipate. We crave “outcome goals”: looking good, feeling good, getting praise, and being in control. It’s not an evil impulse, but setting a goal like “I want to do CrossFit so that I look good” is one of the weakest goals you can choose. Not because it’s wrong, but because it’s too small for you.
Ideals over outcomes
Outcome goals (looking good, hitting a number) can be achieved and exhausted. Growth goals orient us around ideals (courage, reliability, generosity), and are inexhaustible – which is exactly what gives them staying power. Outcome goals are like bubbles multiplying themselves. This overabundance sounds like freedom. But it can lack meaning. And meaning fuels attention.
Everything in CrossFit changed for me when I shifted my goals from “I want to look good,” to “I want to be a strong man who can protect his family.” Consistency isn’t powered by intensity; it’s powered by identity.
From a UX perspective, goals only stick when they stand out. Your brain is filtering thousands of inputs every minute. The goals that survive that filter are the ones tied to identity and meaning. If a goal doesn’t connect to who you believe you are — or who you want to become — it fades. You might not forget it intellectually; you’ll just stop acting on it. It’ll wither and dry up and reduce you to tears like Alexander.
Make identity inexhaustible rather than just admirable
Let’s go a layer deeper. Let’s connect the kind of person we’re becoming to the real people and real relationships we have. My goal of being protective matters because of the real relationships I have and want to deepen.
The best fuel isn't "I'm the kind of person who finishes x, y, or z" — it's "I finish because someone is counting on me" or "this work serves people who need it."
CrossFit gives structure, constraints, and shared standards. But more importantly, it creates an environment where you can attach deeper meaning to what you’re doing. A workout is never just a workout. It can become: showing up when you don’t feel like it, encouraging the person next to you, choosing discipline over comfort, and practicing courage under fatigue. These are character goals, not just performance metrics — and they last longer.
You don’t need more goals. You need better ones.
A weekly practice
Here’s a test: write one goal that inspires “future you.” Not impresses other people. Not looks good on paper. A goal that's specific enough to act on but meaningful enough to endure.
You can use the formula: “when [trigger], I will [action] because [who it serves].” In my early days of training, I dreaded the 5:15 am drive to the gym. It became a new little goal: “when [I drive to the gym and look at the workout], I will [smile and be cheerful] because [everyone likes a little warmth around them at 5:30 am].”
Keep it simple. Keep it personal. Keep it meaningful enough to cut through the noise.
